Abortion is life-changing. Regardless of the reasons for the abortion or the feelings behind the decision, life will simply never be the same. There was a crossroad, and a pathway was chosen. Yet, there will always be the shadow of the path not taken that can weigh very heavily on many in ways they never expected. Above all, remember there is beauty that can come from the ashes. The awful situation and emotional toll can become a beautiful journey towards healing and new life. There is hope after abortion.
Going through an emotional life event is like falling in a well. When you first fall, you are disoriented and only see dark and feel pain. It takes a while to really gather your bearings and assess the situation. You may even lay there for a while, taking in what just happened. Eventually, you wipe yourself off and look up at the light above. You know that is where you need to go, but you have to figure out how to get yourself out of this. You begin looking for something to support you to get to the top. You might be lucky enough to find a rope or some indentations in the well wall you can use to climb and pull yourself out. But on the way up, you may find that you fall back down many times. The more you work at it, the stronger you get. Eventually, you are able to pull yourself up and out of the well. Though you are out, the experience of falling down the well never goes away. However, you come out stronger from your journey.
Feeling hopeless or even regretful after an abortion is not uncommon. Abortion is such a large and very final decision. Decisions like that can not only break you down, but also haunt you. It is not something that you “get over” but rather something from which you live and learn. If you feel as if you have fallen into a state of hopelessness, the first step will be to look up. If you stay there in the depression, all you can see is the dark of the well. You will stay, feeling broken and weak. Looking up allows you to see the light. Standing up will be the next step. There will many times where you will want to just lay down and give into the darkness and pain. Standing up will be the first step in fighting to overcome.
Once you find yourself standing, it will be a fight to regain your life and to heal. But there is always hope. There is always the light at the top of that well. It may be painful and hard to pull yourself out of it. It may be exhausting and you may find yourself back at the bottom many times. Even though this happens, acknowledge that it will be a journey, and that it will take support. You will need others to help pull yourself out. Do not take for granted or ignore those lifelines. Focus on the light ahead and the fact that there is life and love at the top. You will have to climb, but you will get out and breathe again.
Are you considering placing a child for adoption? Do you want more choices with your adoption plan? Do you want to regain more control in your life? Visit PregnancyHotline.org or call 1-800-GLADNEY. We can help you put together an adoption plan that best meets your needs.
If you are unexpectedly pregnant, please consider adoption. Visit Adoption.com to view adoption profiles from hopeful adoptive parents. Visit Adoption.com/unplanned-pregnancy to find guidance with your unplanned pregnancy.